In the immediate aftermath of the Washington Nationals' trade for Denard Span, everyone was writing Adam LaRoche goodbye letters, on the assumption that LaRoche would be the odd man in the Great Viera outfield/first base shuffle of Spring Training 2013.

But here comes Davey Johnson riding out to say "Not so fast."

Davey Johnson: "Adam LaRoche is going to come back. If I have to go to Kansas & take him and all his cattle to Florida, I will."

All very well and good, but we couldn't help but notice Davey's disturbing preoccupation with Adam LaRoche's cattle. Here's Davey as quoted in one of Tom Boswell's columns last week.

"Adam's a cowboy. I just bought a quarter of a steer from him. My house is full of LaRoche beef from Kansas," Johnson said. "Ranchers don't need a whole lot of money. He's got his own corn and grass to feed 'em. I know cattle can jump fences, so that might need fixing. But he's slaughtering 'em so fast that fences won't cost much.

"How much feed do you need to buy? Another $25 million ought to do it. What does he need three or four years [on a contract] for? Let's go, man."

Huh. And here we thought the way to LaRoche's heart was through hunting. Let's just hope Davey doesn't try to take LaRoche's cattle hostage if a deal doesn't get done. Could get ugly.