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Nyjer Morgan Needs A New Alter Ego

As Adam Kilgore of the Washington Post noted, Nyjer Morgan is having a pretty bad May. How bad? I'd tell you the numbers, but I don't want to end up with indigestion.


There have been many theories about what's causing him problems, most of which have to do with actual baseball-related things. But to me, there's only one explanation for his problems: the "Tony Plush" alter ego isn't working. All Morgan needs to pick it up is to think of a new alter ego. Once he does that, boom, problem solved!


This is where y'all come in, since I'm not creative enough. What should Nyjer Morgan's new "gentleman's name" be? Put your suggestions in the comments.