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Anybody Want To Buy Karl Alzner's Bowflex?

As you may or may not have noticed, we don't have a classified ad section here on SB Nation DC. But that doesn't mean we don't try to help good people out.

Washington Capitals defenseman Karl Alzner counts as good people, so we'll try to help him out.

These two tweets came from Alzner on Monday afternoon.

That's right, people. Karl Alzner does not come to you with the Bowflex. If you really want it, you have to go to Arlington (at least that's where we think Alzner lives) to get it yourself.

We'll keep you posted as events warrant.